Becoming motivated when there is no reason to be, can be hard to achieve. As women, we are often thought of as the more emotional ones, and also the more emotionally strong ones as well. And while that may be somewhat true, it isn’t always true. Each of us women go through so many challenges (societal, cultural, emotional, and so on) that we can often lose our motivation and sense of self.
The NIH details what motivation actually is. And its more than what we may generally understand it to be. Let me not leave out men. Men too are susceptible to becoming less motivated just as women are. More so if they feel like they have to provide but don’t have the gumption to get up and do something. Not for lack of wanting, though . If you feel like you are starting to go into a downward spiral, it’s time to stop and reflect.
1. Practice Active Meditation
While we are taught that meditation is the technique of quieting the mind, it can also be a place of calm from where you generate good thoughts and ideas. It is also the place from where you can address the raging thoughts and work them out of your head. Albeit, slowly but surely.
Meditation is however very difficult for those who find it hard to quiet the mind (learn how to meditate here), but dedication and consistency is key.
If you are able to close your eyes and move your attention to the breaths you take, then focus on that. If you are unable to do that, try moving your focus from the top of your skull down through the rest of your body parts, down to your toes.
Once you get there, you’re done. And while this is just the start, it is also a reminder to you that while you feel demotivated, your body is still with you and ready to support you. Read more here on how to meditate correctly.
2. Engage with Positive Energy
When we are in the presence of positive energy, our minds tend to get uplifted too. This can mean that you call that ‘always upbeat’ friend of yours to just ask how they are doing.
After talking to them, you feel like you have renewed energy. Take that energy to keep you going until you get yours back. This obviously doesn’t mean keep calling your friend to drain them, so tread lightly. It is the same energy you get when you are around a baby or a little child. They have no worries or concerns, and that is realization for us that we can focus on, and enjoy the here and now.
Even a newborn baby, who has no sense of self, is the ultimate reminder of how precious and loving life is without the drama that comes along with growing older.
3. Visualize Your Future
In a time where you feel de-motivated, it can be hard to picture a bright future. However, knowing that we always have a choice of a different future is key to keeping motivated. You may be in a certain situation that causes you to feel stuck. If you truly look at your options, there are probably ways around it, outside of it, or through it.
Our limiting beliefs hinder the way we think about solutions and so we tend to lose hope and motivation. One way to get past that is to visualize a desirable future. Picture positive changes in your life one to three years in the future.
Where would you truly like to see yourself? Use that as your picture of hope to get and stay motivated. Creating a vision board and looking at it daily is another reminder of what the future can hold for you.
4. Chunkable Motivated Action
When you are demotivated, its easy and understandable you want to throw in the towel. However, it is only when you feel like you have the world on your shoulders, do you truly feel that way.
You feel everything is going wrong. Or nothing ever goes right for you. You get on the comparison car-ride, and you never get off. Humans were never created to be genies. We unfortunately can’t make anything full and complete with the snap of our fingers. If we could, the world in its current form wouldn’t exist. So with anything, baby steps.
Staying with the example of babies, they turn over before the crawl, they crawl before they stand, they stand before the walk, and they walk before they run. And in all those activities, they fail 100’s of times before they succeed.
In the same way, if you try to do everything in one shot, you will get disappointed. Smaller actions towards a larger goal, is the only way to stay motivated. For this instance, I do not like the saying “keep your eye on the prize”.
That has caused me a lot of anxiety in my past because I’d always think of how I need to get to the end goal. And how it’s not happening as fast as I thought it would. Or that there are too many steps to get there.
All of these are anxiety inducing, de-motivating thoughts. So now I focus my attention on keeping my eye on step not the staircase, the piece of pie not the whole pie, and the task not the project.
5. Slash Society’s Expectations
I saved the worst for last. In my culture we have a saying “log kya kahenge?” Roughly translated to mean, what will people say? This is one of the surest ways to keep you de-motivated.
You did not come to this world because society asked for you. You did not come to this world to live up to society’s expectations. Also, society does not pay for your bills! While this is hard to do, letting go of societies expectations of you will free you up to do your soul’s purpose.
And once you understand that your life is worth just as much as another, you will be able to honor your life and focus on what truly makes you happy. And how does this relate to self-motivation? If you are working on and towards your own happiness, this will generate the internal subconscious motivation without much external help.
Ultimately, I could have given you a bunch of things like, stick motivational quotes on your mirror! Or make your bed every morning! But I think the real work to motivating one’s self is mostly internal. Doing the internal work is hard and does take time. But if you truly desire to be and stay motivated, you’ll first take a look inside and clear the doubts and resistance, and dare to believe in yourself.
Featured photo courtesy of pexels.com
Article last updated on September 21st, 2021